As Seen on TV

I am a sucker for informercials. Many a late night have I stayed up purposely to watch them. Most times, I've been able to resist, but sometimes, I do manage to call within the next fifteen minutes to take advantage of the expedited shipping and bonus gifts, as evidenced by the Snuggie blankets and the Bare Minerals make-up (keep in mind, I don't even wear make-up) in my possession.

It amazes me the types of products people hawk but someone's got to be buying, right? Someone even more gullible than me?! Yep, there's a sucker born every minute. Rather than staying up late to catch these informercials yourself, check out a great compilation that the Huffington Post put together.

From the list, the Tiddy Bear and Kush are my favorites:





Seriously, you've got to check out the stupidest product videos because it ranges from kooky to completely disturbing. Lucky for me, the Sham-Wow isn't on the list...I'm still eyeing it.

Remember, watch the videos but don't be tempted to call the 1-800 number!

-Thuy

Ask a Dad

Gender Neutral Toys


Dear Ask A Dad,

My child has been invited to a classmates' birthday party, whose parents drive a hybrid and sometimes think war isn’t always the best solution. I’m afraid whatever gift my child brings might upset their sensitivity toward gender stereotypes. What should I do? Help?

Sincerely,

Worried in Wyoming


Dear Worried in Wyoming,

Buying your children gender-neutral toys not only provides your kids a healthy point-of-view, but more importantly, it’s a fun social experiment for any parent who always wanted to play scientist with live subjects. The following list provides numerous gender-neutral gift ideas for little Chris, Riley, Jamie, or Casey.

• Pink gas mask
• Boxing Gloves with a floral design
• Play kitchen with George Foreman grill accessory
• Eskimo Dolls
• Potpourri scented machine gun
• Sulfur scented hand lotion
• 1000 piece puzzle of a cloudless sky (this one’s cruel to either gender)
• Exploding bracelets
• Transformers that play Jonas Brothers music
• Skull-&-crossbones tea set
• Dollhouse for ninjas
• Cash

Now your problem lies in which fabulous gift to give; there are so many choices! Hope your little one enjoys the party and let's hope the friend (and the parents) appreciates the thoughtful gift. Kids can be so ungrateful these days.

-Tyler

Tyler H is a guest blogger and father to Emi. The Three Bay B Chicks have asked him to shed light on a Dad’s point of view under the stern supervision of his loving wife. If you have a question for Ask A Dad, feel free to submit it in the comments section. The Three Bay B Chicks are not responsible for Tyler's "advice."

So Many Choices

Like any parent I often wonder what Emi will be when she's older. Will she be driven with passion or live with us until she is in her late 50's?

We try to be very supportive of all her endeavors not wanting to sway her from her true talent.

Thus far Emi has shown a keen interest in a variety of things. She could very well become any of the following:

A MARINE BIOLOGIST


A FOOD CRITIC


AN ARTIST


A GEOLOGIST


A TELEVISION CRITIC


A POLE DANCER



We are hoping she grows out of the last one, but we hear they make pretty good money! Reach for the stars little one!

-Kacey

TGIF, everyone! For a description of who Francesca has been meeting at her son's preschool, be sure to check out Scary Mommy today. Making new friends is not for the fainted-hearted.

Talent Discovered

This morning’s topic on Yo Gabba Gabba! was talent. Apparently, everyone has one according to DJ Lance Rock.


It got me thinking…what is my talent? Starting projects and not finishing them, check. Shopping online, check. Eating candy, check. Wrighting, cshek. Don’t judge me.

Around 3:32 PM it hit me. My talent, without a doubt, is procrastinating. I’m SO very talented at putting things off. If procrastinating were a sporting event, I’d get first place every time…or would it be last pace? I have a loooooonnnngg list of things I’m supposed to be “getting done” this summer. Consolidating Emi’s clothes, organizing my school stuff, taking things to goodwill, potty training (not me), and the list goes on and on. So far, I’ve been able to cross the most important item off the list - that being getting the satellite dish fixed. How else am I going to learn how to cook Italian food if I can’t watch Francesca’s favorite, Giada, on the Food Network? How will I know what fashion is current if I don’t have access to The Real Housewives of New Jersey?


If I could get my act together I would most definitely want to be as organized as Tsh Oxenreider, the mastermind behind Simple Mom. To say she is a planner is to say Michael Jackson is peculiar. I stumbled upon her great blog while I was putting off preparing dinner. You really have to check out her organizational tips that are free to download from the resource section on her blog.


Perhaps if I used one of these nifty pages each day they’d keep me in line.

Ooh! I just thought of another one of my talents – idea stealing.

-Kacey

I Think Mary Might Be Drinking...

It's sad, but true, friends. As my husband and I sat watching last night's episode of So You Think You Can Dance, I turned to him and again questioned whether or not Mary Murphy has a drinking problem.

During the summer, when TV programming seems to fail miserably and all of the quality shows, like my beloved Ghost Whisperer, have closed up shop for the season, I was excited to see So You Think You Can Dance step onto the scene a few summers ago.

I must admit, though, that Mary's "Hot Tamale Train" approach to judging takes reality TV to an all new level and drives me a bit crazy. In an interview with TV Guide, Mary stated that her sheer "nonstop enthusiasm" is a source of pride for her. To her, enthusiasm is a dying art; an approach to life that few adults embrace. "I don't care what those [critical] people think because [the dancers] deserve more. It's a human connection."

But is she really "high on life"? My belief is that she just plain had too much to drink before filming.

I think Joel McHale would agree with me...


Have a good weekend!

-Francesca

Ask a Dad

Father's Day Gift Basket

Dear Tyler,

Father's Day is approaching and I have NO idea what to get my husband. Help!

Best,
Desperate in Davis

Dear Desperate in Davis,

People who don’t know what to get fathers for Father’s Day don’t know where to buy beer. Seriously, unless your hubby drinks port and plays polo, shopping for your lover shouldn’t be laborious. You ought to know by now that men are easy. We frequently try to pretend to be complex in order to disguise our simplicity. This is both frightening and comforting. It’s frightforting.

The following is a gift basket idea for that special man in your life who’s not like most guys (wink). Don’t over-think this one. If you do, chances are your gift will blow.

Father's Day Basket
Instead of a wicker basket, just put all of the following items into a giant cardboard box. Why a box? Because you can build forts with boxes or drive them down stairwells. Inside the box, include the following:

1. Two kinds of bottled beer. One kind should be Dos Equis. If you’re wondering why Dos Equis, don’t. He’ll know. Even if he doesn't drink beer, he'll still appreciate it.
2. Video Game. You should get him a game you’d rather he didn’t play. Trust me, he won’t play it around the kids…as long as you’re around.
3. Gift certificate to Home Depot. Even if he’s no craftsman, this will boost his male ego that has probably been shattered by years of being forced to watch Oprah. He’ll probably end up buying curtain rods, because he’ll know that’s what you want.
4. Sporting event tickets for him and (this is the important thing) one of his buddies. Remember, this is a gift, not a trend setting habit of female exclusion. Male bonding activities are essential and easily forgotten about.
5. Magnets. Magnets = rad.
6. A note that promises you will take the garbage out.

Happy shopping!
Lovingly,

Tyler

PS: You're welcome

Tyler is a guest blogger and father to Emi. The Three Bay B Chicks have asked him to shed light on a Dad’s point of view under the stern supervision of his loving wife. If you have a question for Ask A Dad, feel free to submit it in the comments section. The Three Bay B Chicks are not responsible for Tyler's "advice."

Love Letters

My Darling Husband,

Over the weekend, I read an article on HubPages.com. It said that I can show you how much I care by writing you a love letter. Not one to let a golden opportunity like this pass me by, I thought it best to follow the suggestion.

Step 1: Open the letter with love

Check. Note the use of the word “darling” above.

Step 2: Tell him the reasons he’s so wonderful

Let’s be honest. I probably do not give you enough credit for everything you do. One thing I’ve been working on lately is to remind myself how much I appreciate you and why you mean the world to me.

I also want to pass along a sincere thank you for the advice you give me on most matters in my life. You continually strive to steer me in the right direction. I love you for that.

However, might I return the favor, with love?

Self empowerment can be tremendously inspiring. I whole-heartedly encourage you to experience its greatness firsthand. If you are asking yourself, “how do I do this,” I might be able to help. One idea is to become a bit of a lighter sleeper, now that we have kids. This would enable you to hear them when they cry at night and get out of bed to see how you can help.

If you want to talk with me more about “empowerment” sometime, know that I have tons of other super-fun ideas.

Step 3: Close with passion

(I’m not sure how to do this, so I am going to skip this step.)

Your Adoring Wife


In coming up with this post, I thought it could be vastly improved if Geoff wrote a response. He declined. However, we agreed that I could write a letter for him…


Dear Adoring Wife,

Who are you and what have you done with the woman I live with? You have never used the word “darling” in reference to me in your entire life.

Three words for you: Suck it up. Your life is not that hard.

Love,

Your Darling Husband

PS: Ask yourself how much time you spend on the computer and then repeat my magical three words that I mentioned above. I love you.

The Secret To My Weight Loss Success

I haven’t been completely honest. When I wrote that I didn’t participate in the last Chick Chat vlog because I had nothing to confess, it wasn’t completely true. I do have one rather large secret that I am quite proud of: I am a weight loss genius. Actually, I should give credit where it is due and say my kids are weight loss miracles.

Everyone faces their own weight loss challenges. I am no different. My quest to be slim and trim is complicated a bit by the fact that I loathe exercise and excel at procrastinating. However, even as toddlers, my kids have managed to help me lose weight without ever having to even raise my heartbeat or break a sweat.

If my kids had the ability to create their own dining experience at every meal, then my weight loss plan might be a complete failure. For example, I suspect that their day would look something like this:

Breakfast: A cupful of whipped cream with about an inch or two of hot chocolate, an Egg-O soaked in maple syrup, and copious amounts of bacon.

Lunch: Macaroni and cheese, accompanied by about a quart of Kool-Aid.

Dinner: Ice-cream.

You might notice that any trace of fruits, vegetables, or food without salt or sugar would be missing.

Sadly, this is not their reality. As tyrannical parents, Geoff and I monitor what our kids eat and regularly say no to dessert if Giancarlo chooses to sit at the dinner table, but to pass on eating.

Similarly, my children return the favor to me and monitor what I eat. In their case, though, they have brilliantly altered their approach in order to keep me on my toes and help me to prevail in my battle against the bulge. My typical day looks something like this:

Breakfast: Nothing. No time to eat. Must blog before children get up and require attention.

Lunch: Make lunch for Giancarlo and Lucia. Once they are happily munching on sandwiches, make something for myself. Mentally applaud my efforts to put together a salad or some type of wholesome wrap. Sit down to eat and have my kids immediately proclaim that they are done. Look lustfully at lunch, but turn away from it to wash sticky faces and hands. Get kids settled in a new activity. Finally return to wilted salad or soggy wrap, which no longer looks or tastes good. Skip lunch entirely.

Dinner: Repeat above pattern. However, out of sheer desperation, eat the scraps from my kid’s plates as I clean up dinner.

9:00 pm: Recover from the day’s events with a pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice-cream. Fall asleep on the couch.

You see? My kids are givers. They know that it is much more important to look your best than to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Everything they do is out of love…right?

-Francesca

United We Stand, Divided We Fall

I have a confession to make. If you promise not to tell anyone, I’ll share it with you. There has been a rift in the Three; a difference of opinion among the Three Bay B Chicks that we may not be able to recover from. As much as I would like to believe that our friendship is strong and can withstand any challenge that comes our way, this topic may very well be our Achilles heel.

In light of our inability to reach an agreement, I submit my argument to the blogosphere today and allow our readers to decide.

Background:
I feel that my long-time friend, Kacey, has gone astray. Back in March, she wrote this statement on our blog, “I’m a loyal fan of Barefoot Contessa and have been known to try a recipe from Giada." Yes, friends, it is true. My dear, dear friend Kacey has turned to the darkside and used recipes from Giada de Laurentiis as a guide for Italian cooking. My heart breaks each time I am faced with this reality.

Like any compelling argument, I must outline the reasons for my belief that we should turn away from Giada's teachings. I have gathered the following facts and photographic evidence to aid our audience in reaching a conclusion.

Evidence:

1) Most of the food that Giada makes is not Italian. I queried the top 94 recipes from Giada available on foodnetwork.com. Here are the first five recipes that came up: Couscous Cakes, Beer-Battered Apple and Onion Rings, Corn and Black Bean Salad with Basil-Lime Vinaigrette, Hibiscus Tea with Vodka and Citrus, and Nonna Luna’s Rice. My fellow bloggers, just because something has basil in it, does not mean that it is Italian. Case in point: Thai food uses basil too.

2) When you Google Giada’s name, you will find an equal number of sites dedicated to Giada’s food as to her cleavage. In other words, enough people in the world have queried the words breasts and cleavage as they relate to Giada that both terms come up in the drop-down menu on Google. This begs the question, “why the low cut shirts?” Perhaps the viewing public should be focusing on Giada's knife skills, rather than her… other assets.

3) I recently sought out advice for this situation from my perpetually level-headed friend, Thuy. She listened, as a good friend does, and made no judgments. However, I would like to point out that after our conversation, Thuy sent me the below photos, which were accompanied by the quote, “In her crusade to show the world how much enjoyment can be derived from Italian cooking, De Laurentiis goes through a lot of tomatoes.”

Rather than belabor my argument, I think it is best to end my post on a high note. If you are in the market for a resource that teaches you about actual Italian food and cooking techniques, I would highly recommend the following: Essentials of Classic Italian Cooking, Cooking By Hand, Trattoria Cooking, and The Silver Spoon.

After all, don’t you think that an Italian cooking icon should look more like this:

Rather than like this:

I leave this critical decision in your hands.

-Francesca

I'm Not Your Friend

I suppose you could say that I am a product of my environment. I come from a long line of women who do not spend their free time outside. My people prefer indoor activities, like cooking, reading, and socializing with a glass of wine in our hand. Sadly, the fondness I have for life inside is not shared with my children.

Giancarlo and Lucia are quite the opposite; their love of being outside means that we spend a lot of time at local parks. Over the course of the last two years since I became a SAHM, I have transformed into a CSI-like investigator at our local park system. I spend my days mentally profiling the different personality types that I come across.

As a public service to the blogosphere, I share the knowledge that I have gained from the playground with you today. The park isn’t quite the toddler utopia that I initially envisioned. Kids steal toys, hog the swings, and think nothing of pushing each other aside on their way through the crawl tunnels. Everyone should be prepared.

Here is a sampling of those who will likely cross your path at the playground:

THE HUNGRY LURKER: This child is not related to you, but somehow magically appears by your side when the snacks come out. Do not look this child directly in the eye. He or she may take this as an invitation to insert their grimy hands into your snack pack. Instead, I like to use the line, “Sharing is caring, but just not today. Why don’t you run along and play on the swings?”

THE THIEF: There are different degrees to the Thief. He or she may be like my kids, where they mistaken a toy as something that is community park property. This situation is easily corrected. However, there is a more serious offender occasionally on the loose. The true thief grabs toys away from your own or off of your stroller. If this situation should arise, feel free to repeat my mantra, “We’re not friends. If the parent won’t discipline this child, I must.”

THE EQUIPMENT HOG: There is no mistaking the Equipment Hog. He or she is continually trying to crawl backwards up the slide or swinging on the swings for 30 minute intervals while others are waiting. (These children grow up to be adults who exhibit similar behavior patterns at the gym.)

THE BIG KID: This is most commonly the rambunctious 6-year-old monopolizing the toddler slide and pushing ahead of smaller children (including yours). For some reason, the Big Kid steers clear of equipment designed for his own age group. The situation is further complication by the nearby parent, who is engrossed in a conversation on their cell phone or a text message regarding a critical issue, such as what Kris Allen is going to do now that he has won American Idol.

THE EXHIBITIONIST: Honestly, I blame the parents for the exhibitionist. This unfortunate child has confused park time with naked time. He or she can be seen peeing in the bushes or streaking across the playground because “it is hot.” I am unsure whether this youngster lives in a home without indoor plumbing, but, similar to the hungry lurker, do not engage and do not make eye contact.

It’s a jungle out there, but armed with the proper information and gear, there is nothing for you to fear. Wear protective eyewear and go forward with confidence. Not only do you need to protect yourself from the sun’s harmful UV rays, but you also need a way to openly stare at others incognito. Never a good thing to be caught rolling your eyes at the things other parents may be saying.

Take my word for it.

-Francesca

Ask a Dad

Summer Funnin’

Dear Tyler,
In this tough economy, I was wondering if you had any suggestions for inexpensive, but memorable summer activities?
Fondly,
Cashless in California


Dear Cashless in California,

Summer’s almost here!! (No offense, Phoenix.) Summer weather always means outdoor fun with the kids – beaches, pools, parks, barbeques, lemonade stands, and sunburns. Actually, speaking of sunburns, Kacey has never had the displeasure of burning. However, she thinks I need to put on sun block just to get the mail.

Here are a few little known summer fun activities your kids will love that won’t burn a hole in your wallet.

Shark Watching
Shark watching is just like bird watching only more rad. Simply go to your nearest beach, wade out till the water is consistently hitting your kid in the chest and wait. It’s probably best to show your child a few pictures of sharks before you go out so they’ll know what they’re looking for. Don’t forget to bring a pair of underwater binoculars!

Star Counting
Star counting is a more interactive way to star gaze. Get your family to a rural destination at 3:00 AM when most people are asleep. Make a game of it by seeing who can count the most stars. Here's a fun rule: When a person reaches 5,000, try to distract their concentration with verbal abuse causing them to have to restart. Good times guaranteed.

Burr Collecting
Go out to a field of weeds and simply see who can collect the most burrs. Whoever collects the most doesn’t have to eat one. No velcro shoes, cheaters.

Swimming

You’re welcome.

-Tyler

Tyler H is a guest blogger and father to Emi. The Three Bay B Chicks have asked him to shed light on a Dad’s point of view under the stern supervision of his loving wife. If you have a question for Ask A Dad, feel free to submit it in the comments section. The Three Bay B Chicks are not responsible for Tyler's "advice."

The Twit-tah

At least, that is how we refer to Twitter in our house. In my book, Twitter deserves not only its own article, “the”, but it should also be pronounced with a thick Boston accent.

Everyone seems to be talking either about or on Twitter these days. I came across a hilariously funny post on Scary Mommy in which she describes bad Twitter behavior that would cause her to stop following. I also learned from a guest post on the Tip Junkie how to take Twitter to the next level. In other words, how to Twhirl, Twuffer, and Twitpic. All good stuff.

Since I began my social media journey, I have tweeted mostly snippets of conversations (or rants) between myself and my son, my husband, or my friends. I am content with my little tweets out into the universe. Some of my friends and family may actually even be reading my 140 characters from time to time.

However, recently, I discovered my true passion on Twitter: CELEBRITIES.

Through Twitter, I am able to come one step closer to an A-List lifestyle and answer my long-standing question of “what the heck am I doing on Twitter?” The solution has always been right in front of me, I just didn’t know it.

If you were to ask me today, Fran, why are you on Twitter, my answer would be quick and succinct: I came to party. I came to get down.

A peak at the tweeps that I tweet:

Yoko Ono, William Shatner, Tony Robbins, Tina Fey, Soleil Moon Frye, Ryan Seacrest, Paula Abdul, Martha Stewart, Margaret Cho, Levar Burton, Lady Gaga, Kevin Smith, Heidi Montag, Dane Cook, Cesar Millan, Alyssa Milano, Sarah Jessica Parker, Perez Hilton, Snoop Dogg, Busta Rhymes, Diddy, Jimmy Fallon, and Oprah.

I like to think that I roll with an eclectic bunch.

Each of my tweeps brings something different to my day. And, since I share such a close, personal bond with everyone, we are all on a first-name basis.

Margaret and Dane, both comedians, make me laugh. Cesar whispers to dogs. I don’t even have a dog and I am fascinated by him. (Plus, I want to be prepared should I ever adopt a dog.) Martha is my multi-media icon. Even prison couldn’t keep that woman down for long. Tony tweets inspirational little quips, like “the enemy is fear.” I have no idea what any of it means, but I like to repeat these sayings to my children in my best Mom voice.

When I found out Heidi was on Twitter, I immediately signed up as a follower. To date, she has only tweeted, “ :) “ and “I love Jesus.” Given how utterly profound she is, I am not sure that she needs to log into Twitter again, but if she ever does, you can bet your ass that I will be there.

Diddy, Busta, and Snoop are also in my posse. I like to read about their travels, although when I excitedly told my husband that Diddy and Jay-Z were in Las Vegas, he replied, do you really think those guys are on Twitter? You are probably reading something written by one of their assistants.

That cannot possibly be true. I feel the connection to all of my Tweeps in the very depths of my soul. I mean, why on earth would someone like Cesar follow me and tweet me directly with the words, "stay strong, stay assertive," if this wasn't a reality?

-Francesca

Keep on Swimming, Keep on Swimming…

Recently, I’ve signed M up for swim class. It was completely last minute, but M is at a point where he needs to work out some of his pent up energy. A lot of pent up energy.

By the time I was able to sign him up, only the earliest slot was available. Not surprising considering that I signed him up 12 hours before his first swim class. (Yeah, I’m a last minute kind of gal.) Needless to say, I was not thrilled at the idea of having to get up and immediately put on a bathing suit. Eck!

My son’s first impression of swim class was that it was “sexy.” As the moms were dressing or undressing themselves and their little ones, M made a wonderful impression by calling them and their kids sexy. Way to impress the ladies, son.

My first impression of swim class was not so positive. Swim class was like a big, warm bathtub where all the parents literally carry their children around and dance in circles, all while their bodies are half-way submerged in water. I don’t know what I was expecting, but certainly not singing and dancing to the Hokey Pokey; all that seems even hokier at 8 AM in the morning.

I was envisioning the Michael Phelps program (minus the weed), where M would be wearing those paper thin suits at the end of the program and swim like a little mer-baby around me. What’s with all this gentle nudging for them to even get their ears wet? I’m trying to train a future Olympian! Geesh! At one point, I almost wanted to tap the teacher on the shoulder and ask where the advanced class was…you know, because M is truly “advanced.”

Well, my lobbying for M’s promotion to the more advanced class is going nowhere. M and I are still in the average people swim class, but that’s because he hasn’t gotten "kicking off the wall" quite yet. We're practicing at home to hone that skill.

All joking aside, one great blessing about getting an early swim class is that the pool is clean. We all know that the swim diapers don’t do much and the idea of dancing around in pee-infested water, while singing the Hokey Pokey song, has me wanting to scream, “Everybody out of the pool!”

-Thuy

Spring Break Reflection

Last week was my official spring vacation. Nine whole wonderful days without 20 first graders, calling me "teacher", tattling on their friends, and asking me questions all at the same time. Bliss! Today, I asked my students to reflect in their journals about their spring vacation. They had to write 5 "good" sentences for me about their time off. Had I written a reflection of my own, it would have gone someting like this:

5 things I learned about Emi (aka Terror) over my spring vacation:

1. Playdates are my friend. This is my new mantra. Emi and I had three fab-u-lous playdates in one week! This, my friends, is going to be a necessity in order to keep my sanity over summer vacation.

2. Emi, much to my dismay, likes to play in the sand. The horror!

3.The Cherry Blossom Festival used to be one of my favorite activities in San Franciso. However, the Cherry Blossom Festival with Emi in a stroller = no fun for mom, grandma, & auntie.

4. Emi is a strange little girl.

5. Teaching 20 children is almost easier than spending a day with my daughter.

Hope you enjoyed your spring vacation!

-Kacey

Ask a Dad

Television: How Much and What?

Dear Ask A Dad,

Can I let my children watch television without damaging their brain development or attention span? If so, what shows should I let them watch?

Sincerely,
Gossip Girl


Dear Gossip Girl,

I don’t know anything about the first part of your question, so I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Let’s move right along to what shows children should or should not watch.

DO let your kids watch sitcoms – that is, the ones that do not rely on laugh tracks. We live in a fast-paced society. Parents don’t have the time nor the energy to do a nine-to-five, cook dinner, pay the bills, taxi kids to and from ninja and accordion practice, help them with homework, AND teach them how to deal with a school bully. Throw in an episode of The Cosby Show and they’ll learn from Rudy how to take care of that bully situation within 22 minutes.

DON’T let them watch anything on the Disney Channel. By doing so, you will help prevent premature boy infatuation and adolescent idol worship. This isn’t as damaging to them as it is annoying to you. More importantly, the shows on the Disney Channel can seriously thwart your child's ability to develop genuine whit, unless they’ve learned to watch with a deliberate sense of irony.

DO let your children watch Crossing Over, as it will teach them how the deceased speak to us through charades. I’m getting a signal from some sort of father figure, maybe a brother, uncle, cousin, or a male friend or coworker, whose name starts with an A or a H or a Z or a Q. Why do the dead talk this way? We’ll never know until we cross over. To be honest, I don’t know how this would help children, but it’s fascinating.

DON’T let them watch Baby Einstein. There’s no astrophysics involved and it was not what I was expecting at all. Instead, replace it with a documentary about the actual Albert Einstein. By making your kids watch it at least once a week, they’ll become conversant at an early age about the differences between general and special relativity. They’ll hate you for it for the first 35 years of their lives, but will appreciate it for the remaining 40. (Hey, that’s over 50% of their life!)

DO let them watch HBO’s In Treatment. This will help you save money on your child’s inevitable need for therapy.

How much TV should you let your children watch? You should let them watch no more than…oops, sorry to end this post a little prematurely, but Fringe started about 5 minutes ago.

-Tyler

Tyler H is a guest blogger and father to Emi. The Three Bay B Chicks have asked him to shed light on a Dad’s point of view under the stern supervision of his loving wife. If you have a question for Ask A Dad, feel free to submit it in the comments section. The Three Bay B Chicks are not responsible for Tyler's "advice."

A Code To Live By

Although my children are young, I worry about their future. Teens today face tough issues and choices. The world that my kids will navigate will be drastically different than the life I knew growing up.

I’ve read that parents can make a difference by really understanding the culture in which their teen lives. Without such understanding, I might never be able to get inside my kids’ minds and understand what’s going on.

However, how on earth do I accomplish this? In a time that is dominated by everything on the Internet, such as social networking, Twitter, and e-mail, how do I help my children become well-rounded individuals?

Like any teenager of the 1990’s, the cornerstone of my morale code was based on a number of “complex” factors. Among these, the most important was a little show my friends and I referred to as The Code. Yes, my life lessons were reinforced each and every week on Fox TV's 90210.

During the ten years The Code was on TV, I learned many, many things that I someday hope to pass onto my own children:

1) The Power of the Protest

I think my friends in Beverly Hills first taught me to stand up for my rights when they banned together to support Donna Martin’s fight to graduate. Protests and petitions are really the way to get things done. I learned that friends fight for friends after Donna’s tragic inability to hold her alcohol at prom led the administration to deny her graduation.

2) Don’t Give Up on a Good Thing

Three words: The Peach Pit. If you find a place you like to hang out as a teenager, why find something new when you are in your 20’s, or even your 30’s? Just open up a “club” in the backroom or simply buy the place, so that you never have to leave.

3) Never Move Out of Your Parent’s House

Brandon and Brenda first moved to Beverly Hills High as juniors. Ultimately, Brandon outlasted even his own parents in the Walsh home, claiming it as his own and having roommates move in during college. Given the current economic climate and the downturn in the housing market, isn’t this a life plan we should all be considering?

4) Just Say No to Drugs
Donna’s addiction to pain killers, Dylan’s addiction to heroine, and Kelly’s addiction to cocaine all taught the viewing public a valuable life lesson. Drugs are bad. And, more importantly, you don’t look good when you do drugs. Think bad hair and rumpled clothes. Ack!

5) It is Wrong to Date Outside your Inner Circle of Friends

There were 8 core members in the inner circle on The Code. (If you cannot name them immediately, you should be reading this blog.) Ultimately, they all ended up either sleeping with or married to one another. It just made sense that way.

-Francesca

A Hair Raising Question For You

Emi has always had issues with her hair. She was born with a lot of it and, over her year and a half lifetime, she's had many bad hair days.

My "go to" hairstyle has always been the clippie. I'd put her hair in a clip everyday and we would be good to go. However, Emi has recently decided that she doesn’t want any clips in her hair, so she takes them out and drops them wherever we may be. Today we lost two of them. Annoying, especially since I just learned how to make them.

As much as I would love to not do her hair and just let her be au natural, it doesn't seem like a viable option. To give you a better idea of what I’m dealing with, here's some photos of my hairy situation:

Here is Emi after she just woke up. Clearly she looks like she should be in a grunge video. This is pretty much how she looks when I take her to daycare.

Her sitter does her hair almost everyday. Although it’s not my style, Emi is glad to have her hair out of her face.

Yet, at the end of the day when I take her hair out it looks like this! Lots and lots of volume.

So my question to you is: bangs or no bangs? Some people say bangs are perfect for little girls, and others have told me that they are very high maintenance, once you start you must be committed.

I am not sure. They seem to work for Suri...

On the other hand, Shiloh's coif looks very stylish without them!

Just like American Idol, Emi's future haircut will depend on your vote. I'll post the results at a later date. I'm hoping you'll be able to give me some insight and share any experiences you've encountered with bangs. I also figure Emi can blame all of you when she is older and in therapy due to her horrible hairstyles as a child.

-Kacey

Is Stealing the Mail a Crime?

Since I began blogging, I have become much more interested in photography. Most bloggers I know have cameras that enable them to take amazing pictures. Even my good friend, Keri, has a Canon SLR-STUVWXYZ. When you actually put our two cameras side-by-side, it is clear why her pictures consistently turn out better than mine.













However, I am a resourceful girl. It seems that Keri’s camera broke back in February and she had to ship it to Canon for repair. Rather than to continue to endure my turn of the century point and shoot, I have been stalking Keri’s mailman, waiting for Canon to ship Keri’s camera to her. Last week, my persistence finally paid off. I was able to intercept the package on its way to Keri’s house and “borrow” it for a while.

I have started taking pictures everywhere I go; inside my house, outside on my daily nature walks…I am like an unstoppable Ansel Adams. My only problem is that the box did not include instructions on how to use the camera. I have been forced to learn through trial and error.

Below are a few of my most recent shots. Take a look and tell me if you can figure out what they are. I’ll post the answers sometime over the weekend.

-Francesca

PS: Don’t tell Keri about this post.