Not Me Monday: Take Two

Last week’s Not-Me-Monday was so much fun that I thought I would give it another whirl. Here are my “never in a million years, not me” confessions...

During one of his more frequently occurring tantrums, I did not look at G and wonder where my sweet and adoring son had disappeared to. I did not feel overwhelmed by his behavior at any point in the week and certainly did not telephone a close friend to ask whether I am the only parent on Earth wondering how to cope and if boarding school is an option for 2 year olds.

I did not eavesdrop on a conversation that took place among several Moms at a local park last week. In addition to not eavesdropping, I also did not slightly choke on my water when one of the mothers complained about having to give her nanny the day off, which forced her to reschedule her volunteer activities and her housekeeper. As she continued to add to her litany of complaints, the woman did not mention that life keeps her so busy that “she didn’t even know that Angelina Jolie had twins”. Upon hearing her final comment, I did not reply, much, much louder than I intended, “What is wrong with you? Do you live under a rock?” I was not completely mortified when not only the mother, but also her friends, turned to look at me. Apparently, my voice does not carry well across a loud and busy park.

I was not in the kitchen with my daughter, who was crying because she was out of Cheerios, and my son who was singing his version of the Mary Poppins’ classic, “Let’s Go Fly a Kite”, at the top of his lungs, when my neighbor telephoned to tell me that her kids do not have lice. I did not have a mild heart attack as she attempted to explain the difference between capsules, which is what her kids do not have, and actual, living lice. I did not have to shlept my kids into the car, drive to the local lice checking salon, and feed my son copious amounts of sugar so that he would sit still while one of the “specialists” examined his head.

There is actually more to the now very entertaining lice story, but you'll have to check back on Wednesday to read the details in their full glory. Until then, there you have it. All the things that I did not do last week.

Looking forward to reading the stories from others who participate in the Not-Me-Monday carnival!

-Francesca